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Destroy gossip by ignoring it.
Whatever you do, good or bad, people will always find something to say. So at the end, the best thing to do is to live to please the creator, and not his creation.
Abu Mas'ud 'Uqbah bin 'Amr Al-Ansari (May Allah be pleased with him) said:
When the Ayah enjoining Sadaqah (charity) was revealed,* we used to carry loads on our backs to earn something that we could give away in charity. One person presented a considerable amount for charity and the hypocrites said: "He has done it to show off." Another one gave away a few Sa' of dates and they said: "Allah does not stand in need of this person's dates". Thereupon, it was revealed:
"Those who defame such of the believers who give charity (in Allah's Cause) voluntarily, and such who could not find to give charity (in Allah's Cause) except what is available to them..." (9:79)
[Al- Bukhari and Muslim].
[Riyad as-Salihin 110]
The man, the wife and the donkey story
A man and his wife were on their way to the market with their donkey. They were each walking beside the donkey when a countryman passed and said, "You fools! What is a donkey for but to ride upon?"
So the man lifted his wife up and put her on the donkey. But soon they passed a group of men, one of whom shouted, "Look at that! The man is a slave to his wife! He walks while his wife sits on the donkey so comfortably!"
So the man took his wife off the donkey and got on it himself while his wife walked alongside him. But they only made it a little further down the road when a group of women came along. One woman scoffed, "Shame on that lazy husband for sitting on his donkey while his wife walks in the dirt!"
At this point, the man and his wife were unsure of what to do. But, at last, they decided that they better both ride on the donkey. So the man lifted up his wife so that she could join him on the donkey as they rode into the market.
But, of course, as they entered the market, one of the shopkeepers yelled at them, "You two should be ashamed for overloading that poor donkey of yours!
The story is telling us,
Whatever you do, good or bad, people will always find something to say. So at the end, the best thing to do is to live to please the creator, and not his creation.
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Backbiting
Allah SWT said in the Quran:
"Woe to every slanderer and backbiter." (Quran, 104:1)
Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) said:
The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, "Do you know what is backbiting?" The Companions said: "Allah and His Messenger know better." Thereupon he said, "Backbiting is talking about your (Muslim) brother in a manner which he dislikes." It was said to him: "What if my (Muslim) brother is as I say." He said, "If he is actually as you say, then that is backbiting; but if that is not in him, that is slandering."
[Muslim].
[Riyad as-Salihin 1523]
...and surely, they shall be questioned on the Day of Resurrection about their fabricated lies. [Quran 29:13]
...and do not backbite one another. Does one of you like that he eats the flesh of his dead brother? You would abhor it. And fear Allah... (Quran 49:12)
It was narrated that ‘Abdullah bin ‘Amr said:
“I saw the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) circumambulating the Ka’bah and saying: ‘How good you are and how good your fragrance; how great you are and how great your sanctity. By the One in Whose Hand is the soul of Muhammad, the sanctity of the believer is greater before Allah than your sanctity, his blood and his wealth, and to think anything but good of him.’”
[Grade: Da’if (Darussalam)]
[Sunan Ibn Majah 3932]
Nafi' narrated that Ibn ‘Umar said:
“The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w) ascended the Minbar and called out with a raised voice: ’O you who accepted Islam with his tongue, while faith has not reached his heart! Do not harm the Muslims, nor revile them, nor spy on them to expose their secrets. For indeed whoever tries to expose his Muslims brother’s secrets, Allah exposes his secrets wide open, even if he were in the depth of his house.’”
He (Nafl’) said: ‘ One day Ibn ‘Umar looked at the House- or – the Ka’bah and said: ‘What is it that is more honored than you, and whose honor is more sacred than yours! And the believer’s honor is more sacred to Allah than yours.’”
[Jami` at-Tirmidhi 2032]
Anas (May Allah be pleased with him) said:
The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, "During the Mi'raj (the Night of Ascension), I saw a group of people who were scratching their chests and faces with their copper nails. I asked, 'Who are these people, O Jibril?' Jibril replied: 'These are the people who ate flesh of others (by backbiting) and trampled people's honour."'
[Abu Dawud].
[Riyad as-Salihin 1526]
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Big benefit to the victim of backbiting.
Don’t feel sad when someone backbiting you.
Backbiting means actually transferring his good deeds to you through backbiting.
Narrated Abu Huraira:
Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) said, "Whoever has oppressed another person concerning his reputation or anything else, he should beg him to forgive him before the Day of Resurrection when there will be no money (to compensate for wrong deeds), but if he has good deeds, those good deeds will be taken from him according to his oppression which he has done, and if he has no good deeds, the sins of the oppressed person will be loaded on him."
[Sahih al-Bukhari 2449]
Don't waste time on revenge. The people who hurt you will eventually face their own crime.
Those people who torture you, tease you, and talk ill of you—do not hate them. Because on the Day of Judgment, when everyone is crying for self [nafsi, nafsi [what will happen to me?, what will happen to me?]]. At that time their torture, teasing, and their talks will be very useful for you.
Hasan sends gifts to those who backbite him.
Abu sa’id al-khadimi reported: A man said to Hasan al-Basri, “someone has backbitten you” Hasan sent a dish of sweet dates to the backbiter and he said, “I heard that you have given me your good deeds as a gift, so I want to repay you for it, but please excuse me for I am unable to completely repay you.”
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Backbiting is worse than fornication, drinking wine.
Al-Bayhaqi reported: Sufyan ibn ‘Uyaynah, may Allah have mercy on him, said, “Backbiting is worse to Allah than fornication and drinking wine, as fornication and drinking wine is a sin between you and your Lord. If you repent from them, Allah will accept your repentance. Yet backbiting is not forgiven unless the victim forgives you.” [Shu’ab al-Imān 6229].
Allah knows the best.
When you commit adultery you can ask Allah for forgiveness and Allah can forgive you but when you backbite someone Allah cannot forgive you unless the victim forgive.
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If someone doing backbiting of you, what is your reaction ?
Destroy gossip by ignoring it,
you will continue to suffer if you have an emotional reaction to everything that is said to you.
Allah SWT said in the Quran:
And the servants of the Most Merciful are those who walk upon the earth easily, and when the ignorant address them [harshly], they say [words of] peace, (Qur’an 25 : 63)
A person who wants revenge and does not have patience will fall into depression.
But a person who leaves all his affairs to Allah and maintains patience will be happy in this world and the Hereafter.
Earn jannah by avoid quarrel
Stay calm when someone is trying to hurt you.
Forgiveness and Your Health
Choosing to give up a grudge is good for your mind and your body.
forgiveness is also an act of self-care that benefits your mental and physical health.
Research shows that forgiveness is deeply connected to well-being. When we hold on to grudges, our bodies respond by staying in a state of heightened stress. High cortisol levels, triggered by constant resentment or anger, take a toll on the body. The unresolved pain can lead to high blood pressure, weakened immunity, and even heart disease.
Holding onto a grudge doesn’t hurt the other person. It hurts you.
Researchers have also found that when people actively forgive, their cortisol levels drop significantly. After forgiving, individuals experience better health, improved sleep, and a reduced risk of chronic illness.
People who practiced forgiveness tended to live longer, healthier lives because forgiveness reduced strain on the body and mind.
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faith missing